February 2010 Archives

Watching TV while Studying IP

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I have reviewed my notebooks on Individual Psychology today, and at the same time, I watched TV all day long. In the morning I watched the news on Tsunami warning, and in the afternoon, I watched a movie titled "Ray." It was a biography movie on Ray Charles.

ray.jpgAlthough I do not listen to soul music these days, I used to love it. Considering my taste of music, I liked rock music in my teens and twenties; I liked soul music and rhythm & blues in my later twenties and thirties; and it gradually shifted to classical music at around forties. When I got married at the age of 24, my bridegroom who was a part-time musician asked one of his friends to sing Ray Charles's million seller GEORGIA ON MY MIND at the wedding party. People laughed because it was a song of the lost love. (After more than 20 years, the result!) So, Ray Charles was a special musician for us. My ex-husband loved soul music like Stevie Wonder and Otis Redding, and I liked Sam Cooke and Marvin Gaye in addition.
The movie "Ray" was very good. When I came to know his music Ray Charles was already a big artist, who was respected as the God of soul music. The movie told me his life as a weak human being and I understand that his life was really the creative source of his music.

A New Lesson of Yoga

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I went to the Isshinji Yoga lesson this afternoon. It was held twice a month at a studio underneath a concrete building Senshinkan, one of the facilities of Isshinji Temple. From my house to the place, it took ten minutes by bus. The studio is used for Judo lessons but was very clean and new. At the front in the studio, I saw a golden statue of Bodhisattva with eleven faces and twelve black statues of Generals. I had never entered such a gorgeous judo studio! The receptionists were monks wearing work clothes with wa-kesa around their necks.

yoga2.jpgWe were recommended to buy textbooks along which they would instruct us. The instructor was a short-haired and large-eyed slim man around 60 who spoke quietly. We were about twenty and spread our towels on the tatami mat, practiced the breathing and the poses. The method was different from what I learned before, but I managed to follow. Both in the beginning and the end of the lesson, we chanted a mantra in Sanskrit three times each, which was one of my favorite mantras, the last part of the Heart Sutra: "Gate gate para-gate para-samgate bodhi svaha." Except this mantra, there was no music nor chanting; only the instructor's low voice, the sound of the air conditioner and our breath were heard in the spacious studio.

yoga.jpgI had not practiced yoga for more than one year, and naturally my body became dull. And I could not raise my right arm today because my stiff shoulder got worse these days. I did it easily a year ago, but what I could not do had been increased.... Breathing at the abdomen continuously was also difficult to me, but after two hours' lesson, I became very conscious about my breathing and I tried to straighten the position of my backbone and the pelvis. It might be very good stimulation for me to be aware of my body, so I want to keep attending the lessons as possible.

I Can Sleep Tonight!

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Today I met four clients of counseling. Two of them were the clients I pondered and meditated on and on and could not sleep before. As for one client, I had thought that we finished Life-Style analysis and could start discussing the present issue two weeks ago. However, something had gone wrong; her present issue seemed to be inconsistent with the inferior position and/or superior goal to which we had agreed. I must have been insufficient in listening to the client's stories. So, today, I asked the client to discuss together the Early Recollections again. The client agreed to it willingly, so we quested the feelings and the thoughts in the ER carefully, and finally found out the unique core of the client's Life-Style. The client was happy to understand her own structure, the behavioral pattern, which had occurred repeatedly and recurrently throughout her life. As for the other clients, I was also conscious of the Dreikurs's "winning the patient" proverb, and tried to lead the sessions. When I do not have a clear goal in the session, the counseling often gets longer, but today I could finish all the four cases on time. So, I guess I can indulge myself at least this evening and sleep well, though I may find something imperfect tomorrow.

A Vajra

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vajra.jpgMy daughter stayed at my home for several days and left yesterday. She goes to Kyoto to attend a seminar under a Professor of Agriculture of Kyoto University once a month. I saw her off at Keihan Tenmabashi Station where she got on a limited express for Demachi-Yanagi.
I gave her a talisman. It was a small golden vajra which a priest of Shingon sect (Tantric Buddhism) in Koyasan gave me. He said it would undertake a misfortune in place of me. Daughter thanked me much but worried about me thereafter. I told her that I had a lot of acquaintances with gods who protect me! I am sure the vajra would help her.
Then I walked along the promenade of the Tosabori River to the clinic in Kitahama. It was very fine and warm yesterday and many people took lunch outside by the river.

tenmabashi.jpg
Today, I have a pain on neck. My lymph glands are swelling from the hard stiff shoulders. Now many people may have pain on necks because we must pay income tax. It certainly is one of the misfortunes...!

Sansho Dayu

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tayu.jpgI am exhausted. I went to a two-acts play SANSHO DAYU by Zenshin-Za company. This play was based not on Mori Ogai's ANJU AND ZUSHIO, but was based on a story which had been spread out by wandering storytellers in the Muromachi era. So the story was more tragic, the slave holder, Sansho Dayu, was crueler, and the torture scenes were more horrible. The speeches and the songs of the Middle Ages of Japan affected me much. The emotions between the lines trembled my soul. So sorrowful!...
What was appealed in the play strongly was that we should live in spite of all the miseries and sorrows. It was a very good play. However, perhaps because I was much too involved in it, I began to have a headache. The medieval tones of the speeches hardly go away from my ears and I cannot recover yet.

Deutsch!

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I bought an easy conversation book, and have started learning German. But because my linguistic ability has been much too biased toward English so far, it is very difficult to learn new language now. The textbook I bought begins with "how are you" level conversations, and does not tell us any phonetic rules. Perhaps auditory type people can learn from the conversation CDs, or sensory-motor type people can learn in the actual situations, but both ways are difficult for me. I want to learn it from eyes: I need to read first. To read German I need to know at least some rules for pronunciation.
However, Dr. Noda, who is very good at German, told me that German grammar was too complicated to learn from my age, so it might be wise just to memorize some basic rules. He said, "Ask me. I will teach you the minimum grammar required." Thanks a lot! And he told me the first basic rules for German pronunciation. Shall you learn together with me?

deutsch.jpgFor Vowels
  ei → [ai]
  eu → [oi]
  äi → [ai]
  äu → [oi]
  au → [ao]
  ie → [ï]
  ~er → [r]but in one syllable word, it becomes [er]

For Consonants
  The last consonant of word becomes voiceless.
  "s" before vowel becomes voiced.

He tells me that German is very easy because there is no exception except words of foreign origin. Is it? I wonder if I can learn those minimum rules by heart....

New Recipe for Unpolished Rice

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One of my friends taught me an innovative way of eating boiled unpolished rice. She comes from Bulgaria, and I guess Japanese can never invent this recipe. Let me tell you. Prepare a bowl of boiled unpolished rice. (I usually cook a lot of unpolished rice, divide it in small containers and store in the freezer. When I eat, I thaw one of them in the microwave oven.) Roast lightly several kinds of nuts, and mince them appropriately; peanuts, walnuts, almond, cashew nuts, anything you like. (I buy a pack of mixed nuts and roast a handful in an oven toaster.) Now, this is the crucial point: Add the minced nuts and HONEY to the boiled rice. Mix them and eat!
After I heard this recipe, I tried it several times. Now it has become my favorite snack on holidays. Believe me. Moreover, it contains many kinds of minerals, vitamins, and fibers. The problem is, maybe, it nourishes you much!

Pont au Courage on February on ER

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It was raining from midnight and was very cold today. I went to Nishinomiya to have the meeting of Pont au Courage. I expected few members because I had heard people were busy. Only one member came. It also is good. We can make use of this small number of people. So we decided to study on our Early Recollections!
First, we drew pictures of our Early Recollections on sheets of paper. Then I asked the member to tell her story. After some questions and discussions, I asked her to tell the story again from the beginning to the end because I wanted to write it down. Her story was consisting of four sentences, and not containing many opinions nor emotional sentences. Next, I asked her about the emotion and the reason for the emotion on each sentence. By asking carefully about the "reason why she felt so", we could agree on the private logic in her early memory. Quite interesting, she agreed that she had kept behaving as the same as she was a child, these days to her husband. When I asked her "What would you do now if you were in the same situation?" she found the answer. She said she would choose the alternative action at her home.

We also worked on my Early Recollection. The member questioned me so that I could call it back to my memory well. When I was in the first or second grade of the elementary school, my uncle took me to a river. It was one of the summer holidays. He drove his daughter (my three years older cousin), my brother, and me to the mountainside. The stream was shallow, but flowing fast. This was the first time I dipped myself in the "real" river in nature. I remember that we wore dark blue swimming wear, and the water was glistening and transparent. The coldness of the water, the weight of the stream, the rough bottom of the river; I was completely unfamiliar to these things. My brother and cousin went in first and called me, but I was on the big rock, hesitating to go in. I was afraid.

er.jpgThen the member asked me what I did afterward. I told her that I went in the river and waded through the stream toward my uncle. I did not enjoy it very much, but I spent a summer day beside that beautiful river. Then she said, "Oh, you were courageous! I do not find any problem in this episode." Thanks! I was the smallest and was conscious of it. But I DID go into the water. I did not jump in and play and splash like my elders, but I gradually got accustomed to the river. I experienced it keeping my pace. This was and still is my way of participating in life. My private logic is: As I am small, I should keep my own pace. And I found out when I was not afraid, I could do the fairly good job!

Compensating the Inferiority Feelings

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I am updating this blog diligently these days, right? Do you know why? Yes, it is because I have decided to go to ICASSI this summer. But in fact, I sometimes feel I am escaping from what I should study now, by writing away easy English sentences....
I guess I had better learn two things more to follow up Dr. Yvonne Schurer's class. One is Life-Style analysis and another is German. Yes, German! Yvonne is a Swiss and her native language is German. Although she speaks English very fluently, it is possible that she wants to explain some complicated ideas in German in the class. Dr. Noda and Dr. Yuko were in Yvonne's class before and they are good also at German. Wow, I am inferior to them, not only in the aspect of Adlerian Psychology, but in the linguistic aspect!
Let me stop and be calm. And think. To compensate these inferiority feelings, I can choose one of the following three.
(1) To strengthen the ability I already have.
(2) To catch up with them.
(3) To give up.
Then of course I choose (1). I can strengthen my English ability by writing many sentences. Moreover, I can increase my possibility in Life-Style analysis in every clinical situation. And perhaps I can start learning a little bit of German, at least German pronunciation. The important thing is not to act from my imaginary fear or obsession. Always I can find the better way when I become calm.

Isshinji

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Before moving to Osaka, I was a member of a fitness club near my house and practiced yoga and/or pilates at least once a week. At the beginning of last year, I found one or two yoga studios near my new home here in Osaka. Unfortunately, my brother suddenly fell ill in January and I got to feel very busy, and gave it up.
After one year, this January, when I had a long stroll to Isshinji (One Heart Temple) near Shitennouji, I found they teach yoga in their studio. Isshinji was established by Honen, and they say Honen did meditation with the Ex-emperor Go Shirakawa, watching the sun set over the west sea.


honen.jpg
They have many buildings such as a temple with one thousand statues, a theater, and a judo studio where they teach yoga on the second and the fourth Saturday afternoons. It costs 1,500 yen for one lesson and they do not require the member's fee. I think it fairly reasonable because it is difficlt for me to come regularly. I could not yesterday, but I plan to visit there at the forth Saturday of this month. I do not know who will be the leader, but I guess he can be more professional, in comparison with the fashionable studios. However, I guess the lesson may be more Japanese style, not like Indian style!

E-Mails on Valentine's Day

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cactus.jpgToday is a St. Valentine's Day so I sent e-mail to my father. I attached a picture of two pots of cactus he gave me last summer to show him they are in good health. This is the first time I show you my cacti, so let me introduce them. The right one is "Cac (Sabo)" and the left ones are "Tus (Ten)." Notwithstanding with all my endeavors to make them bloom, as I wrote before, they did not flower last year. And I moved them to the nicest place of the view so that they will feel like blooming this year. My father enjoyed the picture, adding that he would eat the chocolate in the tea time.
In the afternoon, my brother sent me a thank you mail as I sent him a box of chocolate of NAKATANI last week. He also informed me of his present condition. He is working as a doctor special to kidney dialysis twice a week now. He does not work every day yet, but he has recovered very much. I feel relieved, thinking of his condition of last winter when we could not have much hope.
In the e-mail, he says he is enjoying seeing USAVICH in You-Tube these days. I guess he is a somewhat cynical person and his tendency of books and music is very different from mine. However, as I have never heard of USAVICH, perhaps because I am too out of date, I searched it and took a look at once.
usabich.jpgIt seems to be a popular short animation about two rabbits, "Kirenenko" and "Putin," who are imprisoned in a Soviet prison. Kirenenko is usually quiet, but once he gets angry, he becomes so dangerous; Putin is good-natured, likes enjoying life, but often gets in trouble. It is made in Japan and the story setting is interesting, the pictures are delicate and cute. Well, I enjoyed some of the films about the everyday absurd lives in the prison, though some of the films I did not. If you feel like seeing a very silly one to laugh, see this. If you are interested in a kind of black joke, this is the one I giggled at.

Wearing Daughter's Clothes

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As I attended the third memorial mouring today, I should put on black or gray clothes. I wore a black shirt, a dark gray sweater, and pearl necklace. And I remembered that my daughter has left a pair of black pants at my house. Whenever she comes back to Kobe or Osaka from Tottori, she buys many clothes and books. And she leaves some of the things she has been bringing and goes back to Tottori with her new clothes. She permits me to wear her things and read her books. So, this morning I decided to wear her pants because they were better looking than mine. They were tight for me but I managed to put them on! I think they were the bottoms of the suit we bought when she entered the University of Tottori. She insisted on buying a dark suit so that she would use at any ceremonies. Thanks to her wisdom, I also made them available. Well, I will iron them carefully before she comes to fetch them at the end of this month.

Insomnia

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Sometimes when I think too much I suffer from insomnia. Last night I was thinking about my counseling client and, though I was exhausted and went to bed early, I could not sleep till around two o'clock. I think I failed to get in tune with the client, which made it difficult to catch the very center of her/his logic. I was wondering and thinking and guessing what the Life-Style was like, but it is an intuitive and cooperative work with the client, and is impossible to find the answer alone. I tried to stop thinking because I know it is in vain, but the thoughts simply sneaked in. I had been wrestling for hours, and finally got a conclusion. I should win the patient. I should be confident. Believe in the Adlerian Psychology I have learned. Then I fell asleep.
Today I got up early and went to the memorial service of one of my relatives. More than fourteen people including children gathered and dined together. During the service of the Jodo Shin sect I was rather tense, but I became very very sleepy when I got on the return train. I am sure I can sleep tight tonight!

Visiting Old Parents

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nakatani.jpgYesterday I went to my parents' house with a Valentine chocolate for my father. There is a very nice chocolate shop near Kintetsu Uehommachi Station, Chocolatier NAKATANI. Many sorts of chocolate cakes which are spiced, for examples, by rum, honey, orange, mango, ginger, and pepper(!), are lined up in the show cases. I tried many of them and found out any one of them were very delicious, though they were so expensive! However, this time I bought a box of chocolate and got on the Kintetsu-Hanshin train for Kobe.
My parents were very happy to see me after an interval of one month. I had not seen them since the New Year's meeting. My father is 85 years old now and my mother is 81. Father is taking some medicine for the heart and Mother is taking some pills for neutral fat, but I think they are much healthier as in their age. Mother prepared supper for me and I ate full. When I was leaving, they saw me off at the gate for some time though it was cold. The time of their seeing me off has become longer these days. I think I am going to visit them more often henceforth.

I Will Go!

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I have decided to go to ICASSI this summer. I asked if I could have two weeks' holidays to my boss in the clinic of Nishinomiya, where I am working twice a week. He is an Adlerian doctor and kindly gave me permission. Great! He said he would seek cooperation to the colleagues during my absence. I am very much grateful to his warm support. Wow, I am excited! I have found a cheap ticket bound to Romania and will pay for it tomorrow.
Next I should decide which class I take during the ICASSI summer seminar. We can get all information of ICASSI 2010 here. I will take Dr. Yvonne Schürer's class in the afternoon because it is the very reason I will attend ICASSI this time, but I cannot yet choose the morning class. I should make up my mind and submit the application by the end of March.
Romania! I will buy a tourist guide book about the country and will enjoy planning the trip for a while!

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This page is an archive of entries from February 2010 listed from newest to oldest.

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