It was raining from midnight and was very cold today. I went to Nishinomiya to have the meeting of Pont au Courage. I expected few members because I had heard people were busy. Only one member came. It also is good. We can make use of this small number of people. So we decided to study on our Early Recollections!
First, we drew pictures of our Early Recollections on sheets of paper. Then I asked the member to tell her story. After some questions and discussions, I asked her to tell the story again from the beginning to the end because I wanted to write it down. Her story was consisting of four sentences, and not containing many opinions nor emotional sentences. Next, I asked her about the emotion and the reason for the emotion on each sentence. By asking carefully about the "reason why she felt so", we could agree on the private logic in her early memory. Quite interesting, she agreed that she had kept behaving as the same as she was a child, these days to her husband. When I asked her "What would you do now if you were in the same situation?" she found the answer. She said she would choose the alternative action at her home.
We also worked on my Early Recollection. The member questioned me so that I could call it back to my memory well. When I was in the first or second grade of the elementary school, my uncle took me to a river. It was one of the summer holidays. He drove his daughter (my three years older cousin), my brother, and me to the mountainside. The stream was shallow, but flowing fast. This was the first time I dipped myself in the "real" river in nature. I remember that we wore dark blue swimming wear, and the water was glistening and transparent. The coldness of the water, the weight of the stream, the rough bottom of the river; I was completely unfamiliar to these things. My brother and cousin went in first and called me, but I was on the big rock, hesitating to go in. I was afraid.
Then the member asked me what I did afterward. I told her that I went in the river and waded through the stream toward my uncle. I did not enjoy it very much, but I spent a summer day beside that beautiful river. Then she said, "Oh, you were courageous! I do not find any problem in this episode." Thanks! I was the smallest and was conscious of it. But I DID go into the water. I did not jump in and play and splash like my elders, but I gradually got accustomed to the river. I experienced it keeping my pace. This was and still is my way of participating in life. My private logic is: As I am small, I should keep my own pace. And I found out when I was not afraid, I could do the fairly good job!